On holidays, stress, emotions, money

[dancerjodi]

I could not have said this any better: http://www.thesimpledollar.com/2009/12/22/spending-choices-and-deeper-psychology/

Why do we make ourselves crazy? For who? If we are all making ourselves crazy for the sake of each other, shouldn't it be easy to relax and just enjoy the season? For me, each year gets a bit better I think. :)

Comments

[dancer.livejournal.com]

I wonder if your family did a specific gift swap rather than yankee swap, it would be easier? Don't give gifts to every person, but each person picks a name from a hat and spends $50 on that particular person? Everyone would get something, but I'd bet you'd have more fun buying (and people would have more fun receiving).

[rubicat.livejournal.com]

Elfster.com specializes in this very thing. My friend Carolyn has done a swap for two years, and it works out well......

[nepenthedreams]

Thanks - I may check that out for other purposes (i.e. not my crazy family).

[nepenthedreams]

Now, we DID do that in the past and switched to just a yankee swap. Previously the yankee swap was the silly, fun and cheap variety and we had the name-draw. Then we'd exchange lists and buy eachother gifts.

What would happen is:
Certain members of our family without a lot of money but with very high aspirations and upscale taste would put something on their list that cost more than 50$ - say 60 or 75.

Same member, expecting a 75$ gift now, would see someone else's gift list and cheap out somehow. Example - buy a used version of what was on the list on eBAY...or in the case of the year where I said "fitness videos and workout clothes" - thinking they would buy 50$ worth - I got *one* workout video and a sports bra from Target (more like 20-25 max). So those of us who got cheaped out on - we felt it was unfair - not that the holiday is about fairness, but you felt put upon to buy a pricey gift and then you didn't even get something you wanted.

The whole affair over the years has really turned me off to Christmas present exchanging. It always feels like an "exchange", like you're trying to get people gifts of equal value, like you can't not give a gift if someone gives you one (some people buy extra random gifts just in case they get surprised!), and on and on. That's the part I hate about Christmas.